We all know it can be tough to kick a bad habit or start a new one. Even when we finally get around to trying to change our habits, often times that change doesn’t last long. It just doesn’t stick.
I am a creature of habit and know from experience how hard it is to get out of the same mundane routine. I can’t count how many times I’ve been saying that I want to start doing more yoga. I’ll sign up for a class and love it, but then the next week I’m back to my regular workout routine.
Instead of letting myself fall back into my old ways, I decided to do some research of my own on habits and how to change them for good.
Since I’ve had some success with doing more yoga recently (although it’s still a work-in-progress), I wanted to share some of what I’ve learned about habits, in case you could use some inspiration when it comes to starting new ones or breaking bad ones.
Why is it that we have such a hard time breaking habits and actually sticking to new ones?
There’s a theory called Cognitive Dissonance which is “the state of having inconsistent thoughts, beliefs, or attitudes, especially as relating to behavioral decisions and attitude change.” Meaning, there’s this tendency for people to seek consistency among their cognition’s (i.e., beliefs, opinions). When there is an inconsistency between attitudes or behaviors (dissonance), something must change to eliminate the dissonance.
It’s the dissonance, the behaviors that we form, that are so difficult to change because of how second nature they are to us.
It’s the dissonance, the behaviors that we form, that are so difficult to change because of how second nature they are to us. Which is why we end up back in our old habits because its just easier when we don’t have to think about it.
Take smoking for instance. Everyone knows that smoking is bad because it can cause lung cancer, but yet people still smoke anyways. Since smoking is so addicting to some people, it’s just easier for them to smoke then to try and break their bad habit because it takes willpower to actually stop.
So how do we actually break bad habits and form new ones that work?
1. Start Small
Usually when someone is looking to change a habit or start a new one, it involves some sort of overarching, all-or-nothing approach. Although I think its great to set high expectations, the problem I have with this is that it can really set you up for failure. If you don’t follow it strictly, you may feel let down, useless, or even depressed. Instead, try starting small. For example, if you are looking to exercise more, try just adding in one extra hour a week of exercise. Or if you are looking to eat more healthy, instead of dieting, try adding one more vegetable or fiber to your daily diet. Making small changes each day are more achievable and can really set you up for success, allowing you to slowly transition to that next step once you are comfortable with it.
2. Start Forming a new Habit during a Major Life Transition
If you’ve been going through a transition recently (new home, new relationship, new job, etc.) or are about to, now may be a good time to try something new or form a new habit.
I’ve been listening to the Gretchen Rubin podcast recently and one of the topics she talks about is this idea of forming new habits during a life transition. And that “change is easier when people move or undergo some other life transition that changes the contexts in which they live.”This really stuck with me since I recently moved into a new house.
having a new perspective on things and taking habits out of context, makes it easier to change them.
Of course it’s easier said than done even if you are going through a transition, but having a new perspective on things and taking habits out of context, makes it easier to change them. For example, since I’ve moved to the suburbs, I’ve had the opportunity to change my workout routine since I cant go to all the Barry’s Bootcamp and Flywheel classes that I want.
I finally tried a new yoga studio near me and loved it! Lucky for me, since I enjoyed it, I will be going back. But the point is, I would never had tried it if I didn’t move out of the city and into a new surrounding. Yes, I could have tried a yoga studio near me when I was in Boston, but that would have been more effort to deviate from my normal routine and continue to go back to that class when I already had classes that I liked that were easy for me to get to.
3. Look at the Big Picture
Focus on the big picture instead of how it feels right now. What is this new habit going to do for me in the long run?
Many people give up on new habits too easily because they don’t see immediate results. It’s not until you really start to feel the affect that you realize the benefit. Once you start seeing results, you are more likely to stick to it. It’s just getting over that initial hump that can be difficult.
4. Affirmations
Yes you can!! Giving yourself daily affirmations can be really uplifting and beneficial to talking yourself both into and out of things. Ways to do this is to simply tell yourself out loud or look in the mirror and say things like “you can do this,” or “you are strong“.
Maybe talking to yourself is just not your thang. One thing I like to do for some inspiration is to read uplifting quotes.
You can also have inspirational quotes sent to you daily. The Quotes app is great for this. Everyday you get a pop-up message delivering you daily advice from some of the great minds of the past centuries, as well as today’s business leaders.
5. Seek Help
And if none of this is really helping you and you can’t seem to stick to any of the goals or habits you want to better your life, then seek help. It doesn’t have to be expensive to get help or guidance these days. There are so many great resources out their today like books, podcasts, influencers on social media, etc. that can be very helpful in motivating you to meet your specific goals.
The app Coach.me is also a great self-help tool. It’s like a motivational coach and support community combined into one and you can tailor it to refer to exactly what your specific goals are.
I also recommend reading the book You are a Badass by Jen Sincero and listening to some of Gretchen Rubin‘s podcasts, which is where I have been getting some of my inspiration from recently. Although neither of these are specifically centered around habits, they definitely are uplifting and will help set you up for success and feel more confident in making decisions. They also both offer great recommendations on resources that can help with habit-forming.
Tell me, have you had any success with changing habits? I’d love to hear your story, comment below!
xoxo
Marisa
